The Massive Comics Feature

May 31, 2010

It has come to my attention that I have a bunch of drafts for posts about comics series sitting around cluttering up my to-do box. Thusly, I have decided to combine them into one massive post which will feature all of my favorites briefly and will probably end up being longer than my ridiculously long post about The Girl Who Kicked the Hornets’ Nest.

Mmm, cheesecake.

My secret shame first– Witchblade. Top Cow’s flagship series has been running since 1995 and is one of those series which features a main character who is an impossibly thin, hot woman who, in addition to being liberated and independent, spends an improbable amount of time near-naked. The plot is nothing special, a great concept confusingly carried out with the occasional added complaint of redundancy. It’s something you read and like despite knowing that you shouldn’t, like Twilight (okay, well, let’s not get crazy; it isn’t that bad). There’s a little bit of police procedural, a little bit of history of the Witchblade, a lot of conspiracy, a ton of irrational mood swings on the part of Sara Pezzini, the lead… and a lot of Sara being naked and having the Witchblade (barely) cover her moneymaking parts for her. Way to stay classy, Top Cow.

After shelling out sixty bucks for the compendium of the first fifty issues, I can tell you that nowhere in there does Sara get any real answers about what the Witchblade is or what it wants. Every time she seems to gain a modicum of control over her sentient weapon, that disappears a few pages later with no explanation. And whenever she kills a bad guy they seem to come back to life with no explanation somewhere down the line. Oh yes, and every couple of issues there will

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